What Financial Superhero Power Would You Ask For?
We all want to be a superhero at some point in our lives. In fact, some of us still do.
I can remember a time when I was a kid and all I wanted to do was become Superman. I would have flown over my home city, rescued damsels in distress, thwarted evil master criminals and generally been a pretty cool sort of superhero. However, these days I have got to thinking that maybe I could use my superhuman powers to sort out financial problems as well as to do unspeakably good deeds to save the planet.
The Power to Turn Debts to Dust
I could have some sort of laser beam which turns mortgages, loans and credit cards into dust, for a start. This would be a great superhero power to have and I guess a lot of people would come looking for my help to clear debts. I wouldn’t be too popular with the banks when I do this so I would need to choose my cases carefully. How would I choose which loans to turn to dust? I suppose this is one of the responsibilities of being a superhero. I am sure there are people all over the world who bitterly regret taking out loans or who were misled or even tricked into signing up for them.
The Power to Make Savings Grow in a Matter of Minutes
I think most of us have probably struggled at one time in our lives with a savings account which refuses to grow. With my first ever savings account I set up an automatic transfer to move across $50 each month when my salary was paid. The only problem was that I ran out of money at the end of every month and had to transfer $30 or $40 back. Sometimes I even had to put the whole lot right back where it had come from. At the end of a year I think I had about $40 in there instead of the $600 I had dreamed of having. A superhero power to let me use my laser beam (this is a different one from the laser beam that turns debts to dust so I better not get them mixed up) to grow savings instantly would be great.
The Power to Find Bargains
I am not really clear on how I could use my powers to find bargains. Maybe my x-ray vision would help me see through store walls and find racks of offers. Actually, does anyone know how Superman’s x-ray worked? How did he manage to see the color of Lois Lane’s underwear, for example? How often have you seen an x-ray image with underwear and stuff on it? Shouldn’t he have seen just bones? Perhaps this power could involve a sixth sense which lets me smell bargains from a mile away. How cool would that be when the sales start?
The Power to Fight Inflation
Finally, this last point is one which could help the whole human race. I could be the person who finally frees us from the effects of inflation. Wouldn’t it be great if everything cost the same year in and year out? I might not even need the rest of my powers if I could get this one. If I make prices stand still there will probably be some nasty knock on effects for the rest of the world economy which I haven’t thought of. Never mind, I’ll let some other superhero come along and clear up that mess.
What other financial superhero power do you think would be useful?